The awakening

I've been struggling with this weird ache inside my chest for a while now. Never quite could put my finger on what was wrong. I thought to myself, is this how a midlife crisis feels? Am I officially getting old? I'll admit it, I have been feeling more and more related to my father who fell asleep during the 7 o'clock news every night. But I'm barely halfway through my 30s. Giving modern life expectancies, I still have a long way to go.

A few weeks ago, I felt like I'd hit rock bottom. I have a beautiful family, a gorgeous wife who wants to marry me, an adorable son, a stable job, a roof over my head, food in the fridge. And yet, getting out of bed in the morning had become a fight for life or death. And then one day, during a long walk with said wife as I was ranting about how I felt, the words popped out of my mouth and as they did I felt like they kept floating in the air in front of me and were staring me right in the face: "I just don't feel like I'm reaching my full potential". There it was. That was it. I just don't feel like I'm reaching my full potential. I've had dreams, goals, ideas of what I wanted to do and who I wanted to become. Ever since I was a kid I dreamt big, and I knew I had it in me to do big. But now, every day I would leave for work without a clear compass of what I wanted to get out of work, and every evening I would come home from that job, do my everyday chores and stare at the tv like a couch potato and go to bed. I had become trapped in the rat race. And I wanted out.

"So, do something about it then", my lovely wife said to me. And that's exactly what I'm going to do, something.

I intend to document my full journey in this blog and with that, hopefully inspire others to join me on a similar journey and learn from the pitfalls I encounter.

To infinity and beyond!